Monday Memories With My Mom - RETURNS 5

 The Adventures of Caring for a Mom With Alzheimer's Disease
    My next few visits with my mom before the holidays were somewhat uneventful.  I continued to see small gradual improvements in my mom mentally and physically in her appearance. 
     It was nice to see Christmas notes from school children and little crafts also made by children in her apartment.  There were a few Christmas programs during the holidays, and I am sure my mom enjoyed those.

     On one of my visits, I was greeted by "The Don" who was sitting right inside the door I always enter the building from which happens to be just down the hallway from my mom's apartment.  I was surprised as I have never seen him there he lives in the other wing of the second floor.  I have been gradually learning from Sheri (my mom's new personal aide) that for the most part my mom wants nothing to do with The Don these days.  Apparently, he tried to come to my mom's apartment recently and she emphatically insisted he go away so Sheri told him to go.  Meanwhile, Sheri has also told me that they have breakfast together most of the time and that their banter is a bit inappropriate and flirtatious!!??  My mom strongly denies this if you ask her (but I'm sure it's true).  It should also be noted that (thanks to Sheri) I also recently learned that "The Don" has now relocated to the first floor (same as my mom -- but his daughters put him in the complete opposite wing)!  I am assuming his memory and health have sadly declined.  As they may have already learned, once their memories get worse, one wing of the building is easily confused with the other.

 

     Among other things on my "To Do" list was to pick up a few new sweaters for my mom.  Hers have been looking so dingy, and I'm preferring darker colors and no buttons these days for her.  This is one of the sweaters I picked up for her -- sadly it has already "disappeared".  Many things never make it back from the laundry service that housekeeping provides.  Even though my mom's apartment number is labeled in each item, they were likely delivered to the wrong apartment and we may or may not ever see them!  Still trying to figure out how to get a handle on clothes that disappear...for now saving my energy for some of the more important issues. 

 

 

     This was the first Christmas Eve my brother and I decided my mom would be better off not attending her family's gathering.  It's also the first time I can ever remember not celebrating Christmas Eve with her.  As far as I know, it was the first.  This is her favorite party that she's always loved and it's heartbreaking to not include her and knowing that it was not her decision but mine.

     My brother visited her on the way to the party (she did not really know it was Christmas Eve) and I brought her to my house on Christmas Day.  Since we were staying home, I thought she could just relax and have dinner with us, sit by the fire, and enjoy her grandkids.  My conscience could not let her be home alone for both Christmas Eve and Christmas Day.

     Unfortunately, "relaxing" at home with us did not seem to be an option.  My mom seemed unable to relax and spent most of the day repeatedly asking how Grandma Frog had passed away and asking for more pop to drink.  After a couple of hours, it became clear that everyone would be more comfortable if Grandma was safe and sound in her own apartment.  My husband and Megan took my mom back for me as I was, honestly, a bit overwhelmed.  

 

 

 

     We were so distracted trying to keep my mom content, I forgot to give her one of her gifts...  I had made her a bigger "button tree" to go with the one she liked so much from last year.

 

 

      Between Christmas and New Year's my mother-in-law came and stayed with us.  She has lived in Maine the last several years and has always been a good friend to my mom.  On January 2nd we went for a visit with my mom who was doing pretty well.  She definitely had her unique sense of humor, the kids got a few laughs, and we had a nice visit.

     I was a little discouraged that nobody came to escort my mom to lunch at the time they normally do and should.  We waited an extra ten or so minutes and then decided to walk her to lunch ourselves.  In the hallway, one of the aides said she was "just coming to get her".  She happens to be one that I have not been able to count on in the past.  I may or may not believe she was on her way, but decided to go to their office to let them know.  As luck would have it, the Quality Assurance Manger happened to be there -- so I shared my disappointment with her ;) 

 

The Moms

     For some reason, my mom thinks if her jacket has a hood -- well, that you have to wear the hood!!??  So my kids all decided to put their hoods up too and join in on the picture below. 

We call it -- The Kids from the "Hood"!!!??? 

When life hands us lemons -- we always try to make lemonade!!!!

 

 With this post -- we've officially made it to January 2014 on my Monday Memories!!

Almost Caught Up!!

 

 

 

Monday Memories With My Mom

The Adventures of Caring for a Mom With Alzheimer's Disease
      We were able to get my mom to what has always seemed to be her favorite holiday celebration of the year.  My cousin graciously hosted this year's Christmas Eve for about 30 of us this year.  Christmas Eve has been celebrated with my mom's side of the family since I can remember.  I picked up my mom a few hours before the party was to begin.  I had to have her change her clothes and tried to do her hair and put some makeup on her.  This was not too easy as I was also pressed for time and baking the potatoes to bring for the dinner.  However, we managed.  Kristin helped me.  When we first got there, she seemed to have no idea it was Christmas Eve.  In the car she asked repeatedly where we were going, who was having the party, and where her niece lives.  She has been there at least twice before.  
     Interestingly, when I stopped answering the questions and instead said, "I think you know the answer" she usually does then say the correct answer.  So, after exhausting other attempts at changing the conversation, I played a little game when the questions again started in the car on our way to the party later on.  When we asked her, my mom did in fact have the answers.  So, as you would with a younger child, I told her she was a smarty pants!  Well, she and my kids thought this was good stuff.  So, when I would say, "I think you know the answer you little smarty pants", she would then give the correct answer and a small celebration would take place.  I realize this may sound crazy (it is)...just trying to make the best of a difficult situation!
     Some good news...we got our White Christmas!!  Not as good...it was exactly at the time we were leaving the house.  The roads were icey and I was glad I had picked up my mom before the weather and roads and sidewalks got so bad.  Our 15 minute trip took almost 30 minutes.  Mom might have missed out if the timing had been different.
     My mom seemed okay during the party.  She spent most of her time talking at a table with her two brothers.  To be honest, I didn't stay with her the whole time.  In comparison to last year Christmas Eve,  I would say she was more subdued.  As far as I know, she did not ask for wine.  This was a big deal to her last year.  She appeared less talkative and probably more repetitive.  My kids reported her eating tons of cookies while sitting at the table!  (Ha - YOLO!)  I took her dinner away after she nibbled most of it.  As I said, all in all, I would say she was quieter than last year.  Maybe because last year it was at my house?  Maybe just because. Regardless, that is where she would want to be.

Present Opening Time
My Mom's Great Niece, Maddy (almost 2), Was Blowing A Kiss
 To My Mom (so cute) and I Happened to Catch the Action

     My brother had worked all day (he's a firefighter), so I felt bad having him take my mom home, but grateful he offered and for the break.  Funny story... when he was packing up his car to take her home, I asked if he had her walker.  He proudly said, "yep, it's already in the car".  (Yikes, say what??)  It was super slippery outside, my cousin's driveway is a hill, and my mom falls in her apartment without snow or obstacles...  I took a deep breath and said, "ok"!  I let it go. I could use a break and some help.  If I micro manage I will never get it!  Of course, I would never take my mom outside that way.  However, I reminded myself he is big strong fireman and tried to let it go.  His car wasn't even pulled closest to the door....  However, they did make it to the car without incident.  I did not watch!! 
     That was Christmas 2012 with mom...  On Christmas Day when I asked her if she had fun at the Christmas Eve party she said, "yes, weren't you invited"??  (Yes, mom, I was that girl who picked you up, got ya dressed, bought the presents, answered your questions and hesitantly sent you home with your son.)

     I know she enjoyed it...while she was in the moment!!

 

 

 

 

Oh, It's a Jolly Holiday at...Target

     I interrupt this otherwise relaxing holiday spent with family and friends to show you the small stash of goods I picked up at Target today...50 percent off clearance.
     My husband and I were out doing errands and visiting my mom.  I somehow talked him into popping into Target because it was...there.  I told him I would only look at holiday things.  Well, I combed through pretty well and here is the small stash I came up with.  I wasn't looking for anything specific.

From left to right:

     Tubes of jewel toned ornaments from dollar spot     1.00                   .30
     Star shaped ornament collections                             5.00                 2.50
     Goldfish crackers                                                       3.69                 1.54
     Snowflake paper punch                                           15.00                 7.50
     Wine chiller/ice bucket                                             20.00                 9.98
     Silver Star Tree Topper                                           10.00                 5.00
     Black/Silver sequined clutch purse                          16.99               11.88
     Jewel Toned tealight votives                                    10.00                 5.00
     Wilton Cookie Mold                                                    6.99                 3.49     
     Rudolph Sticky Notes                                                 1.00                   .30
     Colgate Winter Watermelon Toothpaste                    2.99                 1.49

     This particular Target was a little less picked over than "my" usual Target.  This is the first time I have ever seen a Wilton mold pan at clearance, but I probably do not usually go when things are 50 percent off...I prefer 70 percent or more.  I also like the clutch purse and wine chiller.  The shelves will clear much faster once the clearance hits 70 or more so you take your chances.  I was kinda proud I figured out the Goldfish were $1.54 --  I guess because Mr. Goldfish has a Santa hat on.  Many of my finds were on endcaps away from the normal clearance stuff.  It's fun...if you have young kids you can really clean up...as I did back in the day!! 
      One thing I discovered is that my husband is less seasoned in helping "scan" items for me than my kids.  My kids are great at running back and forth to the scanner.  I found out my husband was going to a scanner much further away than necessary (was wondering why it was taking so long, ha!).  He was not as "into" it as I had hoped.  He did, however, encourage a few of my frivolous purchases.
     Have you been out and about clearance shopping?  I might go back in a day or two...without kids/husbands!!!

 

 

 

 

Merry Christmas to All....

Silent Sunday

 

The Christmas card photo a certain boy did NOT want us to use.......!!! 

The mom loves it!!!

 

I {Heart} Christmas Music

     Friday night we had plans to attend the high school concert where Megan and all of the music groups would be performing.  Apparently, this is a concert that the school performs every other year, so it was our first one.  It is obvious a lot of work went into this concert!  There are virtually no breaks in the concert...it just flows from choir, to orchestra, to symphony band, etc. -- each segment overlapping with only a 15 minute intermission.

 

 

 
     The concert opened with a moment of silence for the families in Newtown, Connecticut.  For me, it was bittersweet to be there in the school watching the kids...yet knowing that many families were in the early raw stages of going through something so awful at the same time.
     Two solid hours of Christmas musical entertainment -- and it was awesome!!  The caliber of the talent these kids have is amazing -- sometimes you forget they are in high school.
     I hope you have a chance to grab some coffee, tea or hot chocolate and listen to part of the performances below!!

     We remain proud and enjoyed it very much!!!!!

 

Concert Band and Choir

Concert Orchestra

Symphony Band/Men's Glee Club

A Christmas Festival

Front Row, Third From Left = Megan

 

Carol of the Bells

 

 

Silent Sunday

The Spirit of Christmas...

 

O {Artificial} Christmas Tree!

     Well, like everyone, we've been busy preparing for the Christmas holiday along with our normal every day stuff.  The last couple of years, we have been toying with the idea of getting an artificial tree a/k/a "fake".
     I have really struggled with this, perhaps to the point of ridiculousness!!  I have never been a fan of the "fake" tree.  When I went away to college and came home for Christmas break, my parents had decided to go with the "fake" tree for the first time.  I created some drama over it.  I even went out and got a real tree by myself and took the "fake" one down and put up the real "live" tree.  Ha! 
     As I begin to settle into my older-wiser years, I have come to terms with the fact that there is a place for the "fake" tree.  After all, "fake" tree does not mean "fake" Christmas.  Like many things in life, the tree is symbolic and has little to do with the "real" reason for the season. 
     I also came to realize, I was spending as much time trying to find the perfect artificial tree as I had finding the perfect live tree.  How ironic?  So many times we had such a beautiful live tree...visitors would comment "that can't be real".  Fast forward to now, spending too much time finding the perfect artificial tree -- ya know, the one that doesn't look too perfect!!
      Oh, never mind all that, we ended up going to Lowes and seeing which tree looked best and just buying it -- it helped that it was on sale!!  So, that's what we did.  Oh, the drama. 
     In fact, there are many benefits to an artificial tree:  (1) No needles dropping; (2) No watering; (3) No allergies; (4) Easy Up/Easy Down; (5) No Bare Spots; (6) No Frost Bite Picking Out the Tree; (7) Your Can Bend Your Branch To Hold A Heavy Ornament!!  Well, you get the idea...

     I used to laugh when others would put their tree up the day after Thanksgiving...or sooner causing some to feel inferior for not being "on the ball".  Well, let me just say that when you already have the tree in a box it's a little less impressive than going out and cutting down your tree.  Now maybe I can be one of "those" early/annoying people!!

     After all that, we have embraced our new tree and so far this mom has no regrets?  How about you -- are you a forever "live" tree person or have you crossed over to the "other side"??

Linked up with Honey We're Home for the first time.  Check it out, spread some cheer and show your tree!!

 

  

 

Flashback Friday

     Me and my baby brother, Mike, many Christmases ago!!!!!! 

Yes, my mom even sewed my corduroy skirt and vest!!!  Jealous, right!!?? 

 

 

Christmas Countdown...It's On!!

     Hi!  I'm back from my unintentional blogging break to start catching up and sharing.  Thanks to those who "noticed" I was missing!!!  I will be posting lots of miscellaneous "stuff" in order to catch up, but the most timely as of now is that tomorrow (ready or not!) is December 1st and for many the official countdown begins!!! 
     I don't know what is wrong with me, but I am stuck somewhere between LOVING that my kids are getting older, i.e. they pick out their own clothes, do their own homework, dress themselves, can make their lunch, and they never ask how many days until Christmas, AND WISHING they were still little, I picked out their cute outfits, dressed them, made fun lunches, help them with their homework, and constantly asking how many days until Santa comes!!!  I think the holidays make these changes more obvious -- even starting with Halloween!!
     I recently found myself spending way too much time trying to find an "Elf on the Shelf" on the internet for less than $30.  I soooo badly want to pose that bad boy around my house for my kid's amusement.  Oh, do I have some ideas!!!  But wait, hold the bus!!  My kids are 15 and 12 1/2....is this really the time for me to jump on the Elf on the Shelf bandwagon??  Probably not.  However, if I can get my hands on that little Elf for $20 -- I will !!!  
     The other thing I miss about not having younger kids...  Older kids "know" everything.  If they happen to see me printing a sheet with numbers on it.  "Oh, is that for Christmas??"  My daughter is on Pinterest.  Sometimes I forget this...  "Oh, are you going to make that thing on Pinterest?"  They also use the computer that you might have typed some Christmas activities on.  "Oh, I saw that list of Christmas stuff we are going to do!"  Gone Almost gone are the days when I could surprise them easily.  Ya know, put their Christmas presents in the shopping cart right behind their head.  Or, "look, there's Santa" while you do your miscellaneous secret stuff.  Then there's the whole "how many more days until Christmas"??   We have had a Christmas countdown tree for years. It's a tree with numbered pockets down below and Velcro ornaments for each day. The kids have always liked it.   I like it, too, but it's kind of outdated looking. I've tried to spruce it up with some newer ribbon, but to me it still screams "90s". I also know that Christmas is all about traditions, but I really didn't want to hang that bad boy up again.

Let the Countdown Begin!!

    Rejoice!!   I loved when I saw this Christmas Countdown idea at Hi Sugarplum!.   Modern, simple and practical with the added twist of being able to put items inside the tins. Her tutorial is really excellent, so I don't feel the need to break it down for you.  Oh, except I should say that even if it's late at night when you are making it, you're tired, and your magnetic strips appear to be sticking to the back of your tins, hot glue them anyways!!   I tried to skip that step and here's what I got...

Without Hot Glue!!

Oh, and I do not have a circle punch, so I just simply cut out my numbers.  Keep in mind that depending on how many kids you have, the candy has to be fairly small to fit inside the tins.  If you have a million kids, ya might have to go with M&Ms!!?? 
    Yet, in spite of all of that, I whipped up this little countdown simply because I thought it was fun and even though the kids already know that there's candy inside, are old enough to count it down themselves, and saw my typed up list of Christmas surprises along the way -- well, I will still feel good spreading some good old fashioned "Christmas Joy" with my big ol' kids this holiday season!!!

     How do you Countdown to Christmas -- are ya ready??


 

25 Days

 

Why We {Heart} American Express!!

     It is better to give than to receive.  I believe that -- I really do!  In fact, I LOVE gift giving...not just at Christmas time, but anytime.
     Well, I have a little story to share and it goes like this...  This year my husband and I decided to get all three of our kids an iPod Touch for their Christmas present from us.  They have been wanting one for years.  That would be their only gift from us (ok, we might have given them a couple of other little things), and when I saw a "better than Black Friday" deal on them at...Target I made my husband print out the coupons at work (I couldn't print them for some reason) and had him scurry on off to Target, which he did!!  Mission accomplished, and it was even a few weeks before Christmas.  We knew how excited and surprised the kids would be to get them (especially since we had always told them we were never going to get them one). 
     Do you know where this story is going?  So, Christmas morning we gave them each their gifts.  They were ecstatic, and I have to admit those iPod Touchs are pretty amazing little gadgets.  They downloaded apps, music, played games, texted, etc.
     Then there was the trip to Costco New Year's Eve day when all the kids went with my husband.  I was glad for the break and getting ready for a party.  After Costco, my husband came back in the door and said to me..."your daughter is in the driveway crying her eyes out...her iPod Touch screen is shattered"!!  My heart sank...I could not believe it.  Unbeknownst to me, she had brought it with her and when they got home it slid off the back seat of the car onto the floor of the car and shattered!!??  Less than a week old.  I did not need to lecture her about why she brought it in the first place.  Or remind her that the protective cases from Amazon had not arrived yet in the mail.  Or ask how it slid off the seat.  She is 14.  She knows.  She was devastated.  She knows my speech about expensive electronics, cell phones, laptops, iPods, Kindles, etc...  When they were younger we got them the Nintendo DS and constantly enforced them to be in a case any time it left the house.  We discouraged them leaving the house except for long car trips or special exceptions.  Now, at the ages of 11 and 14, I loosened my nagging and had expectations of them using their own best judgment.
     We went on the Apple website.  The prospects did not look good.  Accidental damage and liquid damage are not part of the warranty.  We took it to the Apple store and had to make an appointment and come back.  From what we had heard, though, the screen fix is half the cost of a new iPod.  Megan searched the internet for answers. 
     In the midst of all that, my husband recalled he had used his American Express card when he bought them.  We had heard many good things about their "embedded insurance" for accidental damage and theft.  He called and filed a "claim" on New Year's Day.  They said we should hear in a week or so.  Three days later we received a letter in the mail giving us a credit for the purchase!!!!!!!  We are soooo happy for Megan, for us and to have American Express there when we needed them.  We have never made a claim like that before.  Lesson learned.  The cases have since come in the mail (of course).  Megan hopes to be able to repair or replace her iPod Touch and will have to make up for any cost difference with her own money.
     In the meantime, thank you American Express for bringing the joy back to my daughter's Christmas and for being there when we needed you!!!!

If You Like Candy Canes...

Target Holiday Clearance 90%
     I don't know why I torture myself...it's obviously like a "challenge" for me.  I had a lot of success at Target's Summer Clearance sales, but this Holiday clearance has not been a winner for me.  I had promised myself to not even go looking until things were 70 percent off.  So, my first trip about a week ago was so disappointing I did not even blog about it, and I promised I would not go again...  Ahem, then yesterday somebody spotted a 90 percent Target, so....of course I went last night.  My Target was still 70 percent :(, no hidden deals in other aisles or nuthin'!
     Today, I went to a different Target near my mom's place.  It was 90 percent off.  However, I only got a few things.  I was disappointed that things like Christmas Yankee candles were only 50 percent off, and many gift sets were also only 50 percent.  Even the gift wrap tape that was ringing up as clearance, was not the full 90 percent off.  The merchandise was extremely picked over, so it was a scavenger hunt.  However, if you like candy canes...walk don't run...there were a ton and they are 90 percent off!!!!  Also, there were a few cute things left for young children, but I decided (although tempting) the clearance prices were not worth having another child...lol !!!
    So, if you see any of these ornaments decorating your Christmas present from me next year -- act surprised, ok!!????  No cute pillows, or clocks, dishes, towels, bakeware, etc...  Let me know if you had better 90 percent luck than I did, I will try not to be jealous!!

All of this for about $3...not bad...

Christmas 2011

    Wow, it has taken me this long to recover from all of the festivities these last few days!  The last minute wrapping and gift buying seem to be one of our traditions.  No matter how hard I try to be organized and ready to enjoy, I am always scrambling right up until Christmas.  So, I've decided to embrace it as part of the tradition!  (However, I did get my Christmas cards out much earlier than usual and I did have gifts for my eight nieces and nephews since October which is a big part of my shopping.)
     Christmas Eve.  As you may have read in my Christmas Eve post, my mom's side of the family has had a long-standing tradition of getting together on Christmas Eve.  It has always meant a lot to me and I know it means a lot to my mom, too.  There were 18 of us -- including my mom's brother  (who looked great!) and his entire family were over along with my brother and his family and my mom and dad.  Thankfully, everyone helps by bringing dishes, appetizers and....cookies!!!!  My husband and I decided to break from our traditional ham dinner and instead grilled NY strip steaks with twice baked potatos and Michigan cherry salad along with rolls, mostaccoli and many other side dishes.
     I would be remiss if I did not mention that the Detroit Lions had a very important game on Christmas Eve and we had a house full of Lions fans.  A win would put the Lions in a guaranteed playoff spot.  The game started at 4 pm and thankfully the Lions had a comfortable enough lead that we were able to eat dinner around the 4th quarter.  The Lions ended by beating the San Diego Chargers 38-10, thus giving the men in our crowd even more reason to be merry and bright! 
     Lucas, our 3 1/2 year old cousin, was the star of the party!  He is my cousin's little boy and is soooo cute and funny....and, as a bonus, he is not at all afraid of our giant goldendoodle, Lucky.  Lucky has not seen very many people who he can kiss in the face without even having to jump up -- and he met his match with Lucas.  Lucky was soooo tired after everyone left that we will have to have Lucas over again real soon!  It is always so nice to see everyone, and I wish we all lived a little closer!
     Later that night, my husband and I were up late cleaning up and making sure things were in order for Christmas Day.  Things are definitely getting easier, as we were asleep before 2am, unlike the days when the kids were younger and we I would be up most of the night. 
      Christmas Day.  The kids had promised us a 9 am wake up time, and I think we made it until 8:50 am.  Not bad!  Yes, Santa spoiled the kids again and so did we.  Among some of their favorite gifts, Vera Bradley for the girls, Wipeout for Wii, and an iPod Touch for each of them!  Oh, and check out the giant helium clownfish that Aunt Jill gave to Jacob (below)!!!  Omg -- it's huge and I've never seen anything like it...especially in my house!!  As for me, my husband gave me an iPad...even though he was not supposed to get me anything!!  Of course, I love it!
     Later in the day, my dad came over again to exchange gifts, but most of our Christmas Day was spent with just my immediate family relaxing and appreciating all that we have. 
     December 26th.  On the 26th we got together with my husband's side of the family by making the 2.5 hour trip to Grand Rapids to my husband's sister's house where my mother-in-law (from Maine) and my husband's other sister (from Chicago) were staying.  You may recall, they had stayed with us for the Thanksgiving holiday.  As always, my kids had a great time with their four cousins, we ate, drank, and exchanged gifts and stories, picked up our Lucky dog from Camp Bow Wow day care, and then drove back.  We had a really nice time.  I did not take a single picture :(
     With our Christmas celebrations winding down I always get a little sad with how quickly it seems to go by after all of the anticipation and preparation.  So over here, we are going to try to keep the Christmas spirit alive all year long -- the world would be a better place, wouldn't it??

     Hope your Christmas was Merry and Bright!!

sparkly packages for special people

 melted snowman cookies found on pinterest.com

 melted snowmen can have flaws...I would have tried to perfect them

 snowmen everywhere!

 Christmas Eve, Megan and Kristin

 Christmas Eve chaos

 My brother's wife, Melissa and my niece Nicole

 Cousins, Nicole and Kristin, both 11 years old

 Danielle and Brian, my cousin (awwwww....)

 As the night went on, Lucas couldn't wait to get on his pjs!!!!

Jacob Christmas morning with his iTouch

 Kristin, Christmas morning with her iTouch

 Megan...iTouch!

 the giant helium clownfish!!!!!!!

 if mr. clownfish knocks over my mantle...trouble!

kissing the clownfish?

the drive to Grand Rapids on the 26th, watching The Smurf Movie

Megan reflecting on the benefits of being nice, not naughty

my gift... ;)