In the past, my mom was always good about sending cards for birthdays, special occasions and Christmas. It's something she's always liked to do, and I enjoy it too. She kept reminding me to get her some Christmas cards. I was skeptical as I know that her writing is not as good as it used to be which means I end up addressing the card, buying them, getting the stamps, etc... However, I thought I would buy an inexpensive box of cards and have her sign a bunch and send them out for her. For about a year, I had tried to oversee her birthday cards for family and friends, but it gets to be a lot of work for me and sometimes she wants to "white out" her mistakes. It takes a lot of patience on my part.
I decided there was no harm in seeing how she did with signing them. Her writing was not too bad, so I sent a few out for her. Unfortunately, now every day she calls me and asks who I sent cards to or requests that I send one to someone else (usually someone I already sent one too). It may sound simple but, frankly, it's exhausting for me during this busy time of year. I hope I still go to heaven even if I sometimes tell her I sent a card to someone that I didn't. I may still get to them, but by the time I go over and get the card, get it signed, etc.... Ugh! (Funny side note: My mom just called while I was typing this to ask about sending a card....again....to the same person...again!)
So, you see, I am walking the fine line of trying to give my mom some enjoyment and independence, and not wanting to add any extra pressures to my own holiday lists. The same also applies for gifts (which my mom really can't afford) and other family things.
**Update** Me and my girls stopped by today for a visit. I brought my mom some clothes to wear for Christmas, brought some treats for the staff that takes care of her, bought her a few odds and ends, and then Megan and Kristin hung out with her while I did some secret Christmas shopping. My mom was doing well.
This Saturday my mom will be at our house for our Christmas Eve celebration with her brother and all of his family along with my brother and his family and my dad. This has always been my mom's favorite family celebration. She is known for putting on her Santa hat and very excitedly passing out presents and a few other antics. It will be interesting to see how she is this year. Last year she was much more subdued than usual and put her coat on very early and sat on the couch waiting to leave. This was very out of character for my mom. Traditionally, she also spends the night at my house. Last year that did not go very well. She fell Christmas morning and was acting odd and disoriented. This year, we will just have to see how she is doing that day and hope that she is able to enjoy herself and family!
Mom - December 19, 2011
Mom and all her grandchildren - December 2004
Megan, Grandma, Kristin - December 19, 2011